Mixed Up

Mixed Up is the drama track from the CROSS A LINE album.

Cast

• Subaru Kimura as Ichiro Yamada
• Haruki Ishiya as Jiro Yamada
• Kohei Amasaki as Saburo Yamada
• Shintaro Asanuma as Samatoki Aohitsugi
• Wataru Komada as Jyuto Iruma
• Shinichiro Kamio as Rio Mason Busujima
• Yusuke Shirai as Ramuda Amemura
• Soma Saito as Gentaro Yumeno
• Yukihiro Nozuyama as Dice Arisugawa
• Sho Hayami as Jakurai Jinguji
• Ryuichi Kijima as Hifumi Izanami
• Kento Ito as Doppo Kannonzaka
• Ryota Iwasaki as Sasara Nurude
• Kengo Kawanishi as Rosho Tsutsujimori
• Takaya Kuroda as Rei Amayado
• Shota Hayama as Kuko Harai
• Yuki Sakakihara as Jyushi Aimono
• Eiji Takeuchi as Hitoya Amaguni
• Naomi Kusumi as Shakku Harai

Translation

Employee	And that concludes the details for this project. We look forward to your participation, everyone!
	"Freestyle Gladiator", huh.
	Ahaha! I can’t believe we got asked to appear on a TV special!
	The crazier fact is that we all agreed to do it…
	Guess it seems like everyone here has wanted to do a freestyle rap battle without our Hypnosis Mics.
	Yo, Ichiro-san. You don’t actually believe you can beat me, do you?
	Of course I’m gonna beat you. Better yet, I’ll pulverize you!
	Huh… I’ll put you in your fuckin' place, twerp!
	Ha, you’re such a joke. I’d like to see you try!
	Both of you, calm down. We’re at a television station. Please do not fight.
	Hmph!
	You guys, listen to this: What d'ya call someone who’s prepared to have kids? Readily a(p)parent! The network station’s prepared to have us fight for their show too!
	Hahaha! That was a pretty lame joke!
	Anyways, shuffling members excluding its leaders to create 3-person teams sounds like a fascinating project.
	Yeah, it’s defo something fit for TV! Bet our views'll be off the charts! And on top of that, we hafta spend the entire day before the battle with our new teams, ain't it?
	Hmph, no matter who I’m grouped with, I’ll train ‘em so hard.
	I won’t lose!
	I’ll pummel everyone into the ground.
	Whatever happens, I know I’m gonna win!
	As my duty as a participant, I will be giving it my all.
	Well, let’s have a fun battle, y'all!
	Hmph, better come prepared.
Announcer	Next up, we have news regarding the discovery of an illegal mic manufacturing plant. The Chuohku Criminal Bureau has reported that they have shut down the plant that was run by the anti-Party of Words organization known as the New Japan Liberation Organization. The police is currently in the process of investigating the leaders of the organization.
	I can’t believe there’s still people out there doing that sort of thing.
	Kh... ghhh... So heavy!
	You better not be crying over this, Aimono! Man up already!
	You sound just like Kuko-san…
	Heheh. Like Kuko, huh? Yeah, Guess you’re right.
	Anyways, I know we just picked names out of a hat, but it still feels weird that the three of us are in a team like this.
	And on top of that, we have to run a takoyaki stand to strengthen our bond… What’s up with that?
	Sorry for making you guys work this job with me.
	Alright then, let’s start setting up. I haven’t cooked in a while, so I’m itching to get in the kitchen!
	Aimono, your job is to cut the green onions. Tsutsujimori-san, can you please prepare the octopus?
	Yes, sir!
	You got it.
	Two packs, order up!
	Thank you for coming.
	Aimono, bring us more butter!
	Waaah! There’s so much to do!
	Ichiro-kun, five more packs, please.
	Got it!
	Ichiro-san, we’re almost out of ingredients!
	You gotta be kidding… I'll go out and buy some more! I'm leaving you both in charge.
	Okay, you can count on us!
	Okay! Tsutsujimori-san, let’s do our best!
	Yeah!
	Huh? Where’d all the customers go? Did we run out of stock already? Hey guys, sorry to keep you waiting!
	Huueeeeee...
	There we go, I’ve got another fresh batch ready!
	Woah!! …What in the world is this… Is this black glob supposed to be takoyaki?
	Tsu… Tsutsujimori-san made this…
	What do you think? Doesn’t it look delicious?
	Uh… Um, there’s no way we can sell this!
	Why d'ya say that!? It tastes so good!
	Are you serious? …It’s delicious.
	Wait… For real? Ahh, it’s yummy!
	See, toldja!
	B-but… We can’t sell something that looks like that…
	Hold on, we can use this to our advantage. There’s no way anyone else would also be selling something like this! Let’s change our stand sign to say "Black Takoyaki"!
	Black takoyaki… I feel like I could come up with a cooler name… I know! Black Matter Octopus Inferno.
	Bla- Oct- Inf- Eh??
	Haha! Sounds cool! It gives off quite the impact!
	Hehe...
	Alright then. From here on out, we’ll be the “Black Matter Octopus Inferno” stand!
	Okay!
	W-well, I guess impact is important…
	Phew, finally done.
	I… I’m so tired…
	Thanks for your hard work today you guys. Aimono, your naming of "Black Matter Octopus Inferno" was terrific. Tsutsujimori-san, your cooking generated hell of a buzz. I’d call today a great success.
	I’m glad I was able to help!
	There’s no doubt that my takoyaki- Ahem... Black Matter Octopus Inferno is delicious.
	So now, let’s head home, eat dinner, and work on our rap!
	Sounds good!
	Gotcha!
	How in the hell did you get mugged before meeting up with us?
	Well, Kannonzaka does have a face that screams “please steal from me, I’m vulnerable.”
	Ahaha… please steal from me, huh…
	For a while or not, you're in my team, Kannonzaka. If someone's tryin' to start shit with you, that means they're startin' it with me.
	Haha. Plus, money is important. Don’t worry, we’ll make sure to get your wallet back.
	Aohitsugi-san… Amayado-san…
	You did the right thing taking a picture of the thug who mugged you, even though it’s only a picture of his back.
	Yeah, I was planning to hand this to the police.
	Let's start searching for the bastard.
	Yeah, but first things first... Kannonzaka.
	What is it?
	Let's see... There we go.
	Money?
	I'm a bit thirsty, could you go buy me some tea at the store over there?
	HUH!? O-okay, no problem...
	Why'd ya make him go the store? There's a vending machine right here.
	Don't worry, you'll see. Let's tail him.
	You're up to something, ain'tcha?
	Hieeeeee...
	Huh? Kannonzaka got himself into something again? Wait a sec... That's the same back from the pic he took...!
	Bullseye!
	Amayado. How d'ya know he was gonna be here?
	Heheh, wisdom comes with old age. Plus, I've got a couple of friends here and there for things like this.
	Who the fuck are you?
	I'm just a booze lovin' uncle!
	Hmph. Whatever, we gotta save his ass.
	Hold on. Kannonzaka's acting kinda strange.
	You want me to tell you my PIN...? Th-the money I’ve been saving from my work that has chiseled away at my life…Y-you’re g-going t-to…u-use it…
Thug	Huh? The hell are you mumblin' about?!
	YOU WORTHLESS PIECE OF SHIT! FINE THEN, COME AT ME! IF YOU WANT MY SAVINGS THAT ARE WORTH MORE THAN MY EXISTENCE, THEN PUT YOUR LIFE ON THE LINE AND COME AND GET IT!!!!! I’LL PROTECT MY MONEY OR DIE TRYING!!!
Thug	What the fuck? Losin' his temper like that!
	COME AT ME!!! I’LL FUCKING KILL YOU!!
Thug	I-I’m very sorry…
	I CAN’T FUCKING HEAR YOU!!
Thug	I’m sorry! I’ll return your wallet! Please forgive me!
	Huh?
Thug	Hiiieee...!
	…What was that all about?
	Hahaha! You've got balls, man, I was wrong about you!
	U-um...
	Alright then! This calls for a drink!
	My treat today.
	Oh, how nice.
	Uhh, o-okayyyy...
	Flee markets can attract quit a crowd
	Right??
	You don’t realize you’ve got a whole bunch of clothes that you never wear ‘til you organize it.
	…And there we go.
	Whatcha selling, Riocchi?
	This is my homemade canned goods.
	Lemme see, lemme see! What kind of stuff is this?
	I’ve got brown bear preserved in miso, yezo sika deer in sweet soy sauce, candied bee larvae, and more.
	Woooaaah, that's not the stuff you buy at the store. Didya really make all this yourself?
	Indeed. Made them in case of emergencies.
	Oooooh, I wanna try it!
	If we have some leftovers, I will be glad to share with you.
	Yaaay!
	Oh, looks like it's about to start.
	Alright guys, let's sell out of everything!
	It seems as though my kittens cannot find me.
	Umm…Do you guys think it’s because we picked a bad spot?
	If we continue to stand here with our arms crossed, our defeat is imminent. We must develop a strategy.
	Hmm…Oh, I know! How about we all wear clothes I’ve designed and attract customers through that! Here you guys go! Put it on~!
	So this is a three piece suit with manga speech bubble print.
	Pink-colored… camouflage gear?
	This is what we call fashion! I think you’ll look great in it!
	Hm. I am in fact a beginner when it comes to fashion. As a master of your trade, I will trust your judgement.
	Wow! Both of you look incredible!
	Flashy patterns put me in a happy mood. Plus with this outfit, I can still interact with women.
	This gear... would not be suitable on the battlefield. It would actually make me an easy _target.
	Now then, let’s start reeling in the customers!
	Okay then.
	Roger that.
	Hey everyone, come and see what we’ve got for sale! We’ve got tons and tons of clothes designed by the suuuper cute Ramuda-chan!
	Ladies and gentlemen, please stop by at the Hifumi Izanami's flea market, if you so please. I’ll promise you a service that will be well worth the time.
	We never know when an unexpected disaster could strike! Enemies are all around us. If you were to flee from the enemies by hiding deep in the mountains or in caves, with my homemade canned food at your disposal, you will be able to replenish your energy. Come and see my products!
	Phewww, great work today, you guys! Our method of attracting customers was super effective!
	Nice job, fellas! I sold out of everything!
	Ahaha! I sold everything too! How about you, Rio?
	I have one item that was left.
	Oooh, then let us try it!
	Of course.
	What kinda food is it?
	It’s fermented salted herring.
	Urk…Could it be surs-
	I’ve never had that before!
	It’s an acquired taste, but rather delicious.
	I’m so excited!
	I’ll open it now. Wait one moment.
	H-hold on! If you open that- H... H... ARGHHHH...
	Wh-what the heck is that rotten smell…
	The odor is pungent, but the taste is… Mmm! Delicious! Here, help yourselves.
	No way!! He’s eating it so happily!
	This smell's gonna traumatize me…
	C’mon guys, let’s get this over with. I brought tons of games and snacks so that we can learn to communicate smoothly.
	Geez, what a middle schooler thing to say.
	Look who's talking! You two are the ones just standing around awkwardly.
	I apologize for making you worry. Since we are here, how about we play one of these games?
	It’s been a while since I’ve played a board game.
	Now then, I will start us off. Seven, huh. This space says…
	Let’s see here… ”Share a surprising memory from your middle school days.” You seem way too serious, Jakurai Jinguji. I bet you didn’t have any friends back then.
	Haha... I may seem that way, but I happened to have plenty of friends. In fact, Hitoya was one of my closest friends.
	Huh? Is that true?
	It’s all in the past.
	Well then, could you share a story about the two of you?
	Let’s see… Oh, I know! I have a story from the time we were second years in middle school when we went to summer camp.
	...! Summer camp?
	What’s that?
	It is a group sleepaway event where we go to a facility in the mountains and participate in activities such as cooking and orienteering.
	Oh.
	The rooms we stayed in had around ten beds, and Hitoya and I were roommates.
	Hey, are you going to tell that story…?
	I was going to… Do you have a problem with it?
	Of course I have a problem with it! Stop this right now!
	Hey! Stop interrupting during the middle of a game. You’re an adult, aren’t you?
	Tch.
	This is a story about a time when he showed us magic card tricks.
	You can do magic tricks, Hitoya Amaguni?
	...
	His hand movements were magnificent, my teenage self was marveled at the sight. When he successfully performed his trick and his audience was in awe, he asked us to call him "Heaven the Magic King".
	Shut up! There’s no need to talk about something that happened way in the past!!
	Why are you panicking over this? I was surprised from the bottom of my heart, so I called you "Heaven the Magic King" out of respect.
	Enough! ENOUGH OF THIS!!!
	"Heaven the Magic King". You thought of a pretty good name for yourself.
	His techniques were worthy of the title of king.
	Kh... This is a crazy game, isn’t it…
	I’m up next. It landed on eight. An embarrassing story from high school? Dammit, I’m still in middle school so I have to pass this round! Dammit!
	Tch, so this is a game where youngins like him are at an advantage.
	Hitoya, he can’t win a point this round, so he is at a disadvantage.
	I’m just thinking about it differently. Haah... I’m taking one of these chocolates.
	Sure.
	I would like to have one as well.
	Urk!! Th-this is… A whiskey bonbon!
	Yeah, and what about it? I got some just for you guys. You better appreciate it!
	Jakurai! Don’t eat-
	Hic...
	Too late...
	Hic... hic...
	We have to get out of here now!!
	Huh? Why?
	Don’t ask questions, just run!
	Where the hell do you think you’re going?!
	Uh-oh...
	Wh-what’s happening here?
	More booze! Bring all the booze you can get!!!
	Finally, the show begins! Welcome to Nurusara’s Shopping Extravaganza! Today we visit Kuromon Marketplace! And today, I have two very special guests who will be the Nuru to my Sara!
	Hello, nice to meet you. My name is Jiro Yamada of Buster Bros!!!. Pleased to make your acquaintance.
	Huh!? I'm Jiro Yamada!
	Huh!? I’m Jiro Yamada! You’re Saburo!
	What are you talking about?? Are you nuts?
	Ahaha! Great, they’re already spittin' out jokes. Didya guys prepared beforehand?
	Like hell we did!
	Well, what I said about being Jiro Yamada was a lie. Gentaro Yumeno is the actual name of mine. To everyone watching at home, nice to meet you all.
	We’re just getting started, and I’m already exhausted…
	Looks like we’ve gotten to know each other a bit better now, so let’s get going!
	Yes, let’s.
	Alright!
	Alright, we’ve finally made it! This here is the famous deli that always gathers a huge crowd: “The Fried Food Store”!
	The line sure is crazy.
	It does seem to be a popular store.
	The croquette bread they sell here is exquisite, so let’s have a taste!
	Woah, it looks delicious!
	Oh, what a sight. The large croquette seeps out of the soft bun and is complimented with a tower of fresh cabbage…I must say I am impressed.
	I was s'pposed to say that, but Yumeno-sensei took the words straight outta my mouth…
	Hey, can I eat this now?
	Sure thing!
	Well then.
	Thanks for the meal! This is amaaaaazing!!!
	I see… I now understand why people would line up for this.
	You could even say this croquette bread deserves the title of “exquisitely among exquisite”!
	I’m grabbing seconds!
	You’re so quick! You already finished?
	This is still our first destination. Even though the store is providing us with as much bread as we want, if you fill up now, it will only cause trouble-
	Phew, I ate so much!
	No way… This kid really ate five of 'em!
	Hah... I’m too full to eat anymore.
	We’re s'pposed to stop at other restaurants next though…
	Excuse me, but I have a suggestion.
	Oh, what's it??
	Since we have visited one food related location, how about we enter a bookstore next?
	Uh, umm… Why’s that?
	I released a new book the other day, and I would like to promote it.
	Ahaha... I mean, sure I guess…
	Instead of that, how about we go to the skateboard shop over there?
	I propose that we split up.
	Yeah, good idea!
	...My show's in shambles…!
	I’m so excited to try Nagoya ramen.
	Hm…Why are we at a ramen shop in the first place?
	Hahaha! It’s part of your training.
	I have a bad feeling about this...
	I don’t really care what we do, as long as you’re payin’.
	Hey, boss! Give us three orders of “you-know-what.” And for the level…Lunatic Nightmare!
Chef	Are you insane? That’s not something humans should be eating.
	Hahahaha, don’t worry about that, just bring it out!
Chef	Fine, it's your funeral...
	Hey! The chef just said what you ordered isn’t made for human consumption!
	Time to show me your guts.
	Well, I’m starving, so I could eat anything!
Chef	Order up.
	Oh! Our food’s here! Our food’s here!
	Urk! You call this… ramen? It’s completely black!
	Alright! Time to eat, y’all.
	Great, thanks for the meal! Gha...! Ughughugugh! Wh-what in the world is this… It’s sweet as hell!
	Sweet? Mine is ungodly spicy!!
	Haha! This ramen takes each flavor palate to the extreme! By the way, mine tastes of a sourness that I’ve never experienced before.
	This feels like a prank. You shouldn’t play with your food!
	There’s no way I can eat this!
	Last time I was here, Hitoya foamed at the mouth and passed out, and Jyushi wept for 3 days straight.
	You’re the devil in the flesh…
	I’m sorry, but I can’t eat-
	I’m payin’ for this! And I’m not letting you waste a single noodle. Now, eat up before it gets soggy!
	Dammit…Not cleaning my plate goes against my morals! LET’S GO!!
	Dammit, how did it end up like this? I’m gonna do this, I’M GONNA DO THIS!!
	KUUUUKOOOO!!!!
	Wh-what the hell?
	Gh... How dare you lock your own father inside a shed!?
	Gha... Gha... Dad?! How’d you find me here?!
	YOU CAN’T HIDE FROM ME!!
	Locked him in a shed… Why’d you do something like that?
	He asked me to do some chores when I was getting ready to go out. I couldn’t bother with the work, so I just locked him in!
	You’re insane…
	Heh! Okay, change of plans: The three of us are going to take on my shitty dad!
	What!?
	You don't seriously expect us to…
	Don’t think of him as human. Think of him as a feral beast that was just released into a field. Let’s do this! What’s up, shitty dad… I’m gonna beat you today, once and for all!
	Hey, what should we do?
	This is a family matter. We better stay out.
	Now that I think about it, how’d his dad escape from a locked room?
	Today's the day.
	This is my first time coming to a TV station, it’s so big!
	Woah, they even provided us with several types of bentos, snacks, and juice! This shows good contraposition.
	How was it like during your comedian days, Rosho-san?
	We considered it lucky if they even brought out water.
	Ichiro-san, Rosho-san, let’s take a picture together!
	Huh?
	That's fine, I guess.
	Here it goes then. Say cheese! Wow! Can I post this on social media?
	Sure, I don’t mind.
	Same here.
	Yay!
	Jyushi-kun, if you stick with this tourist mindset, we’re not going to win.
	Don’t worry about me! I’m overflowing with courage right now!
	I sure hope so...
	Jyushi, Rosho-san. Are you guys prepared to battle against your team members?
	Yes, I am!
	Yeah, of course!
	Let’s win this thing!
	Ughhhh... The day of the battle has finally come, huh… I-I-I have to make sure I don’t m-mess up…
	Relax, and have some confidence in yourself! Kannonzaka, you’re stronger than you think. You’ve got no reason to feel so down.
	I appreciate the kind words, but me? With confidence…?
	Hey, Kannonzaka.
	Wh-what is it?
	You’ve won the Division Rap Battle. That should be enough to give you some fuckin’ confidence!
	Aohitsugi-san… Thank you, I understand! I’ll be confidently depressed!
	He ain't listenin' to me.
	Haha. Let's just have fun today.
	...Guess it’s starting soon.
	Yeah. I’m excited to find out who our first opponent is! If it’s possible, I want to go up against Doppo-chin in the championships! Best friends battling each other, doesn’t that get you fired up!?
	Izanami, before you start thinking about the finals, you should focus your energy on winning the first round.
	Haha, you’re right. But I don’t feel like we’re gonna lose!
	Hifumin’s right! Do you think we’re gonna lose, Rio?
	What I’m trying to say is don’t let your guard down. We know the weaknesses of our own teammates the most, am I right?
	Yup!
	There’s no-no-no way I’m letting my guard down!
	Splendid. That’s how it should be.
	Anyways, we’ve still got a bit of time ‘til the show starts. What should we do in the meantime?
	Hmm…Oh I know! Let’s give Rio a fashion makeover– I want him to have a more gorgeous style!
	Oooh, great idea!
	I brought lots of spare accessories!
	Since we are going to be in front of a large audience…Appearance is important. Very well. I entrust you both with this task.
	Time to cute-ify him!
	Yeah!!
	Hello, you two. Looks like we are all here.
	Yeah.
	Ah…! Jinguji-san…G-good morning…
	Good morning, Saburo-kun. Saburo-kun, has something happened? You seem to be acting a bit strange.
	E-everything’s fine!
	If you say so.
	Excuse me, but have you had any alcohol today?
	Of course not.
	Uuu... Hey, lawyer! Is this guy really okay?
	Yeah, he’s fine.
	Phew...
	You should be showing me some more respect, kid.
	What? I can respect your profession, but I can’t pay my respects to an annoying geezer like you!
	There’s two things that I hate. First, bars that serve terrible appetizers. Second, people who change their attitude depending on who they talk to.
	See, this is exactly why you’re such a pain.
	...! This sassy brat is really–
	Listen up you two, the show is starting soon. Are you two prepared to battle your fellow team members?
	That’s such a stupid question. I’ve been ready ever since I decided I was going to appear on this show.
	Jiro is out of the question, but I do feel a bit worried about battling Ichi-nii. But I can’t move forward unless I get over this mountain!
	You both have very strong resolve. Let’s do our best to win!
	Yeah!
	Of course!
	And 1, 2, 3, 4… 2, 2, 3, 4…
	What’s wrong, Nurude? You’re always on TV and you're still nervous?
	I ain't nervous. I'm just doin' some warm-up exercises in the waiting room, kinda my routine. Helps me project my voice.
	Is that really how it works? Then I wanna try it too.
	Jiro-shi, Jiro-shi. Would you like me to tell you an even better way to make yourself louder?
	Seriously?! Tell me!
	Spin clockwise 3 times and go “woof woof woof”, then spin counterclockwise 3 times and go “meow, meow, meow”, and then–
	Nurude, what kind of warm-up exercises should I do?
	So there’s–
	I am imposing wisdom on you right now, you know? You should be listening to me properly.
	That’s a lie.
	Yep, that’s a lie.
	Gh...
	So anyways, what kind of exercises?
	Watch closely!
	Good grief, their reactions are too weak for my liking…
	Kuko! Jyuto! If you’re not gonna eat your bentos, can I have them?
	Knock yourself out.
	Thanks a bunch!
	Haah... So astonishingly arrogant.
	He’s a man who truly portrays the saying, “You can’t fight on an empty stomach.” I don’t hate guys who eat a lot. Keep eating, dude!
	Thanks, man, you’re a lifesaver!
	Well, who am I to judge? Anyways, Harai.
	Huh?
	Are you sure we don’t need to develop a plan?
	What a buzzkill. Where’s the fun in doing something so sensible? It’s more fun to give it your all right then and there. Plus it feels better if you win that way!
	Real shit! Let’s go head on and play fair and square!
	Hah. If you say so, then I’ll leave it to you to decide what we do.
	Heh, that settles it. The three of us are gonna wipe the rest of the teams out!
	That’s the plan.
	Yeah! We’ll beat ‘em all!
Terrorist	Attention. We, the members of the New Japan Liberation Organization, have taken over this building.
	It’s that anti-Party of Words terrorist organization.
Terrorist	There is just one easy rule that everyone inside the building must follow: Stay where you are, and do not disobey our orders.
	What do they think they’re gonna do taking over a TV station?
	My theory is that they will take the people inside the building as hostages so that their organization is forced to be broadcasted, and then somehow bargain with Chuohku with our lives.
Terrorist	We’ve blocked off all of the exits. Our men hold Hypnosis Mics. You can’t run, so don’t even try anything funny.
	Well, what should we do? Are we gonna sit around and do nothing?
	Ha! We’re of course gonna go beat their asses.
	Now you're talkin'!
	The other teams will definitely be on the same page as us.
	They'll take all the glory! Let's roll!
	The terrorists are probably gathered in the master control room.
	Gotcha!
	Hehe!
Terrorist	Who the hell are you?! We told you not to move!
	You idiot! You think we’d actually listen to you lot? Get your mics out, guys.
	Alright.
	Going up against us with so few people, such a reckless move. We’ll end this quickly.
	Hahaha, I’ll send you flyin’!
	I ain't listening to a word you say The depths of the abyss is where you’re goin’ anyway
	Works for me, but the slammer will do better Reveal their darkness and then they’ll see hell
	Coming here on a day like this, you’re shit outta luck Time to face the wrath of the MCs, we’ll fuck you up
	Terrorizing us today?
	That’s your first mistake
	Get ready to lose the game
All	We’ll put you all to shame!
Terrorists	AAAAAA!
	Ha! Piece of cake.
	Did they even try and put up a fight?
	Let’s keep going!
	The door should be right around the corner!
	They are indeed here.
	They’re no match against us.
	Don’t guard yer let down…
	You are too relaxed to be making jokes in this sort of situation.
	Who just joked?
	Oh, for the love of...
	Haha! Let’s jet and take 'em down already!
	Alright!
	Yes!
Terrorist	Who the hell are you?!
	Can’t you tell us just by looking at us?
	We are the visitors that you would have never dreamed to have.
	Prepare yerselves!
	Yo! We’re at a TV station, count on my expertise No entry beyond this point, find your way out, please
	What’re you tryna do? Take food pics for the ‘gram? Maybe in this situation, it’s best if you scram
	'I’m a genius, he’s an airhead, and that’s a chatty clown They make my work so easy, we’ll easily take you down
All	Get ready to hear jokes that’ll make you squeal Provided to you by the tsukkomi-less trio
Terrorists	AAAAAA!
	Hell yeah! That was too easy.
	Now, we have opened up this area as well.
	Let’s find whoever’s left inside and help them escape!
	As expected, the front entrance is heavily guarded.
	And they all have mics too. But...
	I believe that we can defeat them regardless.
	No doubt here.
	I’ll make sure they ever regret coming here!
	Great, let’s put an end to this!
	Alright!
	Got it!
Terrorist	Enemy attack! Get in formation!
	Too slow!
	I advise you to end those foolish schemes you’re planning
	You’re wrong if you thought we’d sit around and do nothing
	You made a big mistake by trying to take us hostage We’ll take you down with our mics, be afraid of our knowledge
	Your plans end here and now
	These notes won’t set you free
All	You can’t take back your actions or verses Now get ready to receive your verdict
Terrorists	AAAAAA!!!
	Phew, I’d call our surprise attack a success.
	Now we’ve freed up the front entrance.
	Let’s go get rid of the rest of the terrorists!
	The terrorists should be occupying the Master Control Room. We must recapture that area.
	Okie dokie!
	Haah... Haah... Why… didn’t we… use the elevator?
	They most definitely have the elevators barricaded.
	Can’t expect anything less from a Navy vet!
	If we keep going on like this… I’m gonna lose all my energy before we even get to the terrorists!
	Stop! Sounds of combat boots. The enemy is coming down the stairs.
	Well then, let’s greet them right here!
	Do you guys have your mics ready?
	100 percent!
	I'm always prepared!
Terrorist	You guys are–
	Hiya, nice to meet you! And… Goodbye!
All	Yo! At last, your time has come to an end
	We won’t give you a chance to comment
	You’re rotten to the core, to our mics you’ll be succumbing
	You guys smell so stinky like a can of surstromming
	Perhaps you can call this a standoff between two snipers
	Sticky situation, caught in the web of a spider
	Unlike you, our brains are on high alert
All	Time to say goodbye, this is gonna hurt
Terrorists	AAAAAA!!!
	That was a good formation.
	Riiiight??? Let’s keep this pace and knock out more and more and more and more terrorists!
	Yeah! Let’s become the heroes who defeated the terrorists!
	Outta my way! Tsk. They’re not even here.
	Haah... Haah... Hieee...!!! H-how about we enter with a little more caution next time?! This is a studio, what if they were recording when we came in?
	Hahaha! Kannonzaka, you’re such a funny guy. There’s no way someone’s recording given the situation we’re in!
	Gotta keep going!
	Please wait! We’ve been running around pretty recklessly…Do you happen to have a plan?
	…Huh? Hell nah. I'll just crush every terrorist's skull I see and it should do the thing, ain't it so?!
	Maybe… but… Haah… This is crazy…
	Just think of this as a warm-up. Well one thing’s for sure though, our show is definitely canceled.
	Amayado-san, you’re so optimistic. I don’t have that sort of positivity…
	Kannonzaka! Amayado! Stop your yappin’ and let’s keep moving!
Terrorist	What are you doing here?!
	Perfect, savin' us the trouble of looking for you, dickheads. Both of you, get your mics out!
	Okay!
	Got it!
	Prepare to die!
	So you finally show yourself huh, you fuckin’ roaches Get ready to sink to the bottom of Yokohama’s ocean
	You chose the wrong crowd to pick a fight with, so sadly We’ve got a yakuza, a scammer, and finally…
	Who’re you calling an average salaryman Come at me, I’ll wear you down, you’ll wish you ran!
All	If you need it, then we’ll offer you a handicap But honestly, nothing will save you from our rap
Terrorists	AAAAAA!!!
	Phew… Somehow we were able to win.
	Dumbass. We call this an immense victory!
	It was too immense, that we couldn’t even gain any experience from it.
	Haha... ha...
	C’mon, let’s roll! We’ll crush every last one of ‘em!
	The hostages are rounded up in the plaza.
	And there’s quite a few terrorists guarding that area.
	What should we do? Should we wait for the others?
	No, let’s just go now.
	Yeah, if we were to face them in a larger group, there’s a higher risk that we’d get seen.
	Plus, I’m confident that the three of us can take them.
	Y-you’re right. I’m ready for anything!
	That’s the spirit!
	Great, we’ll take them down, once and for all!
Terrorist A	The main entrance and service entrance have both been taken over!
Terrorist B	Eliminate the enemy ASAP!
Terrorist A	Y-yes, sir!
Terrorist B	Dammit!
	Your schemes end here!
	You’ll pay for what you’ve done!
	Prepare yourselves!
Terrorist B	So you’re the ones to blame… Don’t think that you can get away with this!!
	Rosho-san, Jyushi, let’s go!
	Alright!
	Yeah!
	Yo! Terrorists, get ready, prepare to meet your fate
	Looks like you need someone to set you straight
	The Three Musketeers stand before thee Ichiro-san, Rosho-san, then there’s Jyushi
All	Like a squirming octopus, your actions are rash We flip you over and over, burn you to ash
	We won't
	Back down
	Perfect in
	Every way
All	Take that, the first-rate funk that we convey
Terrorists	AAAAAA!!!
	Haah… Haah… Haah… We… We did it!
	Phew… That’s one mission complete.
	Guys like you don’t have the power to change the world.
	Hey, the others have made it here!
	Aniki!
	Ichi-nii!
	I’m so glad you guys are safe!
	Jyuto! Rio!
	This battle ended sooner than I had expected.
	As I thought, you all were making your moves as well.
	Gentaro, Dice! How’s it going??
	Looks like all of the terrorists have been defeated.
	Really? It’s over already?
	Hey!! Doc! Doppo! Over here!!
	Doctor! Hifumi!
	Neither of you are injured, that is a relief.
	Man, I didn’t really have a time to shine.
	This really isn’t the time and place for that…
	Heheh, this was a pretty amusing time.
	Yo! So how many terrorists did y’all take down?
	I-I didn’t have time to count!
	Kuko… This isn’t a game!
	I’ve alerted the authorities, so they should be arriving soon. I need you all to cooperate. We will be taking everyone’s statements.
	No way in hell I’m doin’ that. I’ll be leavin’, let’s dash, Rio.
	Got it.
	We’ll pass on it too. Rosho, Rei, Osaka's waitin'!
	Yeah.
	Okay.
	We will be on our way as well. Hifumi-kun, Doppo-kun, let’s take our leave.
	Alrighty.
	Okay!
	Gentaro, Dice, let’s go home and play!
	Alright!
	No thank you.
	We’ll settle this another day! Jyushi, Hitoya, we’re off too.
	Okay!
	Got it.
	Well that’s that, I’ll leave the rest to you, Iruma-san. Alright then, Jiro, Saburo, let’s go home.
	Yeah!
	Okay!
	Haah... This is the most disorganized group ever.

Credits

• Translation by shinseimcd