Ayọ̀bámi Adébáyọ̀
Author of Stay with Me
About the Author
Image credit: Ventures Africa
Works by Ayọ̀bámi Adébáyọ̀
Fique Comigo 1 copy
Associated Works
New Daughters of Africa: An International Anthology of Writing by Women of African Descent (2019) — Contributor — 95 copies, 1 review
Of This Our Country: Acclaimed Nigerian Writers on the Home, Identity, and Culture They Know (2021) — Contributor — 16 copies
Tagged
Common Knowledge
- Birthdate
- 1988-01-29
- Gender
- female
- Nationality
- Nigeria
- Birthplace
- Lagos, Nigeria
- Education
- Obafemi Awolowo University, Nigeria
- Relationships
- Iduma, Emmanuel (husband)
- Short biography
- Ayobami Adebayo was born in Lagos, Nigeria, shortly after, her family moved to Ilesa and then to Ile-Ife, where she spent most of her childhood in the University Staff Quarters of Obafemi Awolowo University.[2][3] She studied at Obafemi Awolowo University, earning BA and MA degrees in Literature in English, and in 2014 she went to study Creative Writing (MA Prose fiction) at the University of East Anglia, where she was awarded an International Bursary.[4][5] She has also studied with Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie and Margaret Atwood.Adebayo has been a writer in residence at Ledig House Omi, Hedgebrook, Sinthian Cultural Institute, Ox-Bow School of Art, Siena Art Institute, and Ebedi Hills.[17][18] She was shortlisted for the Miles Morland Scholarship in 2014 and 2015
Members
Reviews
Blijf bij me by Ayọbámi Adébáyọ
I struggled with this one and I hated that I didn't love it. The beginning just didn't hook me. It's told, initially, from 2 perspectives. A poor boy growing up and a woman juggling being a doctor and wife. I listened to this as an audio and maybe that was part of the problem - but I never connected with the characters. I kept waiting for the two stories to connect, for it to tell me why I had these 2 POV. I appreciated the other issues addressed in the story but I just couldn't get pulled in, especially as we got more people and information thrown in the plot. If you like generational stories, this one could be your jam. It just didn't work for me.
A huge thank you to the author and publisher for providing an e-ARC via Netgalley. This does not affect my opinion regarding the book.… (more)
A huge thank you to the author and publisher for providing an e-ARC via Netgalley. This does not affect my opinion regarding the book.… (more)
This book took me through every emotion—hope, admiration, anger, heartbreak, frustration, and even disgust. Adébáyọ̀’s writing completely pulled me in, and I just couldn’t put it down. I had both the ebook and audiobook from the library and when I wasn’t reading, I was thinking about it. I finished the book in 2 days!
This book gives a great glimpse into Nigeria’s culture, traditions, and family dynamics—some of which are actually pretty similar to my own society. It made it easy for me to relate to what the characters were going through.
Stay with Me starts as a love story but quickly dives into darker themes like toxic masculinity, cultural pressures, and the intense struggles around motherhood. Infertility and its mental toll is the central theme, which could be triggering for some readers.
Yejide is a complex character who faces immense pressure to have children in a society that blames infertility solely on women and defines womanhood by motherhood.
As the story unfolds, her husband's secrets, the stress of infertility, and societal pressure push Yejide to her breaking point. She grapples with both imagined and real pregnancies, shifting from the isolation of being childless to the trauma of loss, ultimately shutting down emotionally and leaving Akin behind. Adébáyọ̀’s portrayal of Nigerian culture stands out, showing how tradition often gaslights women into silence and sacrifices.
Set against Nigeria’s political chaos from the 1980s to 2008, I think the novel beautifully contrasts public unrest with the characters' private struggles.
The storytelling is smooth and engaging. I like how Adébáyọ̀ sort of skips long descriptions and just dives right into the drama and dialogue, making the book feel sharp and to the point.
There are a few reasons why I couldn't give this book 5 stars.First, it's hard to believe that a university-educated grown woman who has access to a library to look for sickle cell disease is completely clueless about basic human reproductive physiology and is unable to suspect and look up impotence. Second, has NO ONE ever heard of artificial insemination? Not even the brilliant doctors treating Akin's condition? I am totally disgusted by the solution he came up with!!! And finally, how easily did Akin get away from both murder and attempted murder? He deserved punishment! I felt the ending was unfair to Yijide.
This book really drew me in and shook me. I get that people are willing to sacrifice a lot to have a child—and that’s totally their right—but crossing certain lines just feels wrong. Some mistakes come with a cost that can make us lose ourselves and our ability to love and care as human beings.
This book is great for readers who enjoy thought-provoking literary fiction, especially those interested in Nigerian culture. It may resonate with anyone navigating issues of fertility and identity, but be aware that it includes sensitive topics like infertility, terminal illness, death, and mental health, which might be triggering for some.… (more)
This book gives a great glimpse into Nigeria’s culture, traditions, and family dynamics—some of which are actually pretty similar to my own society. It made it easy for me to relate to what the characters were going through.
Stay with Me starts as a love story but quickly dives into darker themes like toxic masculinity, cultural pressures, and the intense struggles around motherhood. Infertility and its mental toll is the central theme, which could be triggering for some readers.
Yejide is a complex character who faces immense pressure to have children in a society that blames infertility solely on women and defines womanhood by motherhood.
As the story unfolds, her husband's secrets, the stress of infertility, and societal pressure push Yejide to her breaking point. She grapples with both imagined and real pregnancies, shifting from the isolation of being childless to the trauma of loss, ultimately shutting down emotionally and leaving Akin behind. Adébáyọ̀’s portrayal of Nigerian culture stands out, showing how tradition often gaslights women into silence and sacrifices.
Set against Nigeria’s political chaos from the 1980s to 2008, I think the novel beautifully contrasts public unrest with the characters' private struggles.
The storytelling is smooth and engaging. I like how Adébáyọ̀ sort of skips long descriptions and just dives right into the drama and dialogue, making the book feel sharp and to the point.
There are a few reasons why I couldn't give this book 5 stars.
This book really drew me in and shook me. I get that people are willing to sacrifice a lot to have a child—and that’s totally their right—but crossing certain lines just feels wrong. Some mistakes come with a cost that can make us lose ourselves and our ability to love and care as human beings.
This book is great for readers who enjoy thought-provoking literary fiction, especially those interested in Nigerian culture. It may resonate with anyone navigating issues of fertility and identity, but be aware that it includes sensitive topics like infertility, terminal illness, death, and mental health, which might be triggering for some.… (more)
What a wonderful, wonderful book. When Ms Ayobami came to Nairobi in February this year, it was a packed event at the Goethe-Institut Nairobi and ashamedly, I had not read her book yet but still listened to her and Ms Zukiswa and Ms Aleya as they discussed their books. They were all gracious enough to omit spoilers in their discussion so as to spare the unfortunate lot that was those like me that had not read it and did quite a good job, because nothing prepared me for the ride that was this book.
Told in the voices of Akin and Yejide, this is a story of a tumultuous marriage and the pains and joys that accompany parenthood. Ayobami has molded such living and complex characters in Akin, the husband and Yejide, the wife to make such a gripping and moving book. A fantastic story which demanded patience at some points and attention in its twists and turns but rewarding to the very end.… (more)
Told in the voices of Akin and Yejide, this is a story of a tumultuous marriage and the pains and joys that accompany parenthood. Ayobami has molded such living and complex characters in Akin, the husband and Yejide, the wife to make such a gripping and moving book. A fantastic story which demanded patience at some points and attention in its twists and turns but rewarding to the very end.… (more)
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Statistics
- Works
- 5
- Also by
- 4
- Members
- 1,551
- Popularity
- #16,610
- Rating
- 4.2
- Reviews
- 84
- ISBNs
- 58
- Languages
- 12