Some of the stories made me cry, I can't imagine having to give up my child ( )

Review: Message From An Unknown Chinese Mother by Xinran. 11/18/2017

This was very well documental information about China’s culture, traditions, living arrangements, bearing children, and their Government policies. Xinan was a Chinese radio journalist and did a great amount of research which, was well written about individual interviews, family generations, and how little China has advanced over the years. Many of their norms are still being used today over sections of China. Xinran writes with considerate prose after interviewing many Chinese Mother’s about their most painful memories of their newborns forced predetermine fates after birth.

The information was intense how some mother’s were forced to put their babies up for adoption, abandoned babies at hospitals, orphanages, on the street, and how they’ve seen newborns drowned, smothered, and dropped into a waste pan head first. China Government had control of the birth rate where families were only allowed one male child per household, no daughters. Chinese families who lived hidden in remote poverty areas had more than one child and they kept their daughters.

Some of the female babies born were adopted by families of other countries which a few mother’s thought they would have a better life. Xinan made sure the reader knew these Chinese mothers did want and loved their children. If a daughter did survive by chance they could never inherit property. Plus, if the mother bears a daughter the mothers are subjected to years of verbal, emotional and physical abuse, and shunned by the community. Some women are consumed with so much guilt that they committed suicide.

Xinan established a charity called “Mothers Bridge of Love” (MBL). It helps Chinese women who have lost children and children who have been adopted may lack an understanding of their cultural background and gone on living in destitute conditions in China. ( )

This is incredibly hard to read. The stories are about Chinese mothers who, for cultural and economic reasons, were forced to give up their baby daughters for overseas adoption, the alternative being the killing of the girl at birth. The book claims that in less than 10 years 120 000 baby girls were adopted out of China, which seems a huge amount, but these are just the lucky few. This is a heartbreaking book and I was veering between sadness and outrage from the first page to the last. ( )

The book is written to Chinese adopted girls to offer them insight into why their parents may have given them away. As expected it is poignant and rife with agonized mothers. It also gave insight into Chinese life over the past 20 to 30 years from city to rural settings. ( )

Xinran, giornalista e scrittrice, ha cercato, con questo libro, di raggiungere tutte le bambine cinesi sparse per il mondo portandogli un messaggio da parte delle loro madri naturali, le madri cinesi, dicendogli, attraverso varie testimonianze, storie e dolori di madri conosciute da Xinran, che le loro "vere" mamme non le hanno mai scordate e non si sarebbero mai volute separare da loro ma una società ingiusta non gli ha permesso di poterle crescere e vivranno ogni giorno con lo strazio nel cuore.....
Libro molto bello e toccante!Ho scoperto molti aspetti "cupi" della Cina che "sapevo" ma non comprendevo del tutto. Ora ho un dolore atroce come madre nell'immedesimarmi nella vita di queste povere donne e madri, che hanno dovuto reprimere il loro dolore, nascondendolo al mondo ogni giorno per farlo riemergere ogni notte nei loro incubi peggiori e disperati! ( )

The tragedy of abandoned Chinese girls.

As China opens its doors to the West, it becomes more important that we have some knowledge of the country, its people and its history.
Xinran's highly approachable books are an excellent introduction to the way the Chinese think and feel, frequently very differently to the way we do in the West.
Thier ingrained traditions, desperate poverty and single-child-policy, have all played a part in the tragic death of many thousands of baby girls over the years and it is important that we understand the reasons for this awful situation before we judge.

Over the years Xinran has interviewed hundreds of mothers and the ten tragic stories in this book represent the core of their experiences. Often hard to read but written in an easily accessible style, Xinran leads us through the reasons for the decisions these poor mothers were forced to take.
She is particularly focused on the Chinese girls who have been adopted over recent years, she really wants them to understand that they were not abandoned lightly, that each one of them was loved by their mothers and that putting their daughters up for adoption was frequently the only way to save them.

We read this for a book group discussion, which gained its own momentum and flushed out many of the ideals and reasons for this huge tragedy.

There are several appendicies, which I didn't think added much to the book, hence the 4 stars.

I also went on the internet to research The Mothers' Bridge of Love charity, formed to help adopted Chinese girls and their adopted parents understand their situations and possibly make connection with the lost mothers, but it seemed to have been discontinued in 2010 and I couldn't find anything more recent. ( )

Xinran is a Chinese journalist who has collected true stories of Chinese women who gave their babies up for adoption. Designed in part to help Chinese girls who have been adopted into Western families, all of the stories are heartbreaking and all show the hardship and sorrow of the mothers who felt they had no other choice than to let their daughters go, hopefully to better lives. An interesting insight into another culture. ( )