HomeGroupsTalkMoreZeitgeist
Search Site
This site uses cookies to deliver our services, improve performance, for analytics, and (if not signed in) for advertising. By using LibraryThing you acknowledge that you have read and understand our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. Your use of the site and services is subject to these policies and terms.

Results from Google Books

Click on a thumbnail to go to Google Books.

Social Intelligence: The New Science of…
Loading...

Social Intelligence: The New Science of Human Relationships (edition 2007)

by Daniel Goleman (Author)

MembersReviewsPopularityAverage ratingMentions
1,7881610,286 (3.77)5
Well aside form IQ and EQ social intelligence plays a crucial role as well for any sane human being. This book has been very informative specially into the studies of human behavior and how exactly one person interacts with another. I applaud Goleman's research on neuroscience and how it has been correlated to being socially inclined to one another. Well this has been a great book, I learned a lot of useful information and at the same time how this can be helpful in being an effective social person not only for myself but almost to everyone. ( )
  Maddison18 | May 7, 2016 |
English (14)  Dutch (1)  Spanish (1)  All languages (16)
Showing 14 of 14
More of a psychology book than a science book, Goleman does a nice job of explaining the brain biology that underlies our feelings and social interactions. He then goes on to discuss the underpinnings of our social relationships, why some people are psychopaths, the impact of social relationships on health, etc. etc.

I found the first part to be the most enlightening. Goleman discusses how humans are inherently empathetic - - and how empathy is actually controlled by the more unconscious part of the brain. He illustrates this with some interesting anecdotes. One that was memorable to me was an experiment with monkeys. Six monkeys could pull one of two strings for food. One string gave the monkeys a lot of food, but also shocked a seventh monkey in the same cage. The other string gave the monkey a much smaller amount of food and did not shock their companion. Four of monkeys would only pull the second string so that their comrade was not shocked. The other two pretty much wouldn't pull any string and were starving themselves for days rather than take a chance of hurting their companion. I found this to be fascinating - - that their empathy was actually higher than their desire for food.

In addition, Goleman makes a compelling case that emotions are very contagious and that we can spread joy or sadness quite readily to our fellow human beings.

Unfortunately, the points that Goleman makes are hammered home again and again. I felt a bit like his book was a science article blown up into big 300 page book. He did give lots of examples, but after awhile I just felt that his thesis didn't really merit a whole book.

A lot of the book really consisted of his views that stemmed from his research i.e. prisons need to be more rehabilitative, medical caregivers need more time with patients in order to give optimal care (duh), and so on and so forth. He also has a large section on relationships and how your childhood really impacts your own relationships later in life (double duh). It might be very useful to read this section if you do have young children as it does show the impact you have on their lives.

I found the very most interesting part to be the biology that contributes to people becoming psychopaths . . .and that there's definitely an element of brain chemistry that is a contributing factor.

All in all, I'm glad I read it, but I think his first book - - Emotional Intelligence - - was a WHOLE lot better and more interesting. So if you like psychology - - I'd go with that one first! ( )
  Anita_Pomerantz | Mar 23, 2023 |
p.57
  kristiederuiter | May 14, 2022 |
I recently started the Evelyn Wood reading dynamics program (often called speed reading). This book, like many others in this field droned on about various research that has been done. I decided to try the technique of skimming the book and then read it. It worked. The reading became a lot more interesting and meaningful.

We are prewired for kindness. (Ch 4)

Spindle cells are unique to primates & humans have a lot of them. (Ch 5)

Terminology used in this book:
- Low Road - The emotional response
- High Road - The intellectual analysis

"... serotonin is a neurotransmitter that generates feelings of well-being in the brain. ... 95% of the body's serotonin occurs in the digestive tract, ..." (Page 80) Well, no wonder we like to overeat - it makes us feel good.

"SOCIAL AWARENESS
- Primal empathy: feeling with others; sensing non-verbal emotional signals
- Attunement: Listening with full receptivity; attuning to a person.
- Empathic accuracy: Understanding another person's thoughts, feelings, and intentions.
- Social cognition: knowing how the social world works" (P 84)

"SOCIAL FACILITY
Simply sensing how another feels, [Social Awareness] or knowing what they think or intend, does not guarantee fruitful interactions. Social facility builds on social awareness to allow smooth, effective interactions. The spectrum of social facility includes:
- Synchrony: Interacting smoothly at the nonverbal level.
- Self-presentation: Presneting ourselves effectively
- Influence: Shaping the outcome of social interactions
- Concern: Caring aobut others' needs and acting accordingly" (P 84)

Effective listening is a critical social skill. (p 88)

甘える
"English has no word for amae, but it could certainly use one to refer to ... a closely attuned relationship. Amae [is] that we attune most readily with the people in our lives we know and love - our immediate family and relatives... The closer we are, the more amae." (p 108)

"That debate (Nurture vs Nature or Environment vs Genes) turns out to be pointless, based on the fallacy that our genes and our environment are independent of each other; it's like arguing over which contributes more to the area of a rectangle, the length or the width." (Page 150)

It cites a lot of varied research with the notes at the end of the book going on for 55 pages. It is confirmation that this field is still so young that we don't have solid answers, just lots of research that gives some direction, but not yet quite sure of the final destination. ( )
1 vote bread2u | Jul 1, 2020 |
The new science of Human Relationships
  jhawn | Jul 31, 2017 |
Well aside form IQ and EQ social intelligence plays a crucial role as well for any sane human being. This book has been very informative specially into the studies of human behavior and how exactly one person interacts with another. I applaud Goleman's research on neuroscience and how it has been correlated to being socially inclined to one another. Well this has been a great book, I learned a lot of useful information and at the same time how this can be helpful in being an effective social person not only for myself but almost to everyone. ( )
  Maddison18 | May 7, 2016 |
Bottom line: we are cognitively wired to connect to others; it can be healthy or poisonous.
To be reread :) ( )
  pathogenik | Feb 18, 2016 |
This is a great book that covers a lot of interesting subjects such as education, romantic love, juvenile detention centers, jails, and so much more. I will definitely be listening to it several times. ( )
  amimariscal | May 12, 2012 |
A book that may have some really relevant ideas about how to maintain world peace, not just another self centered how to avoid stress and feel good as an individual. Interesting review from Librarythingers here, especially Carlie. ( )
  carterchristian1 | May 14, 2010 |
Full of the how's and why's of human relationships as it relates to brain function. Hoping it's not too late to rewire my social brain. ( )
  hsienlei | Apr 1, 2008 |
I've read Daniel Goleman's previous book, Emotional Intelligence, and I remembered that I enjoyed it but I couldn't quite remember why. By the end of Social Intelligence, I remembered his poignant message from the other book. We need to be good to one another because it is good for ourselves.

What Goleman brought out with Emotional Intelligence, that being smart has less to do with your ability to score well on standardized exams and knowing the technicalities of your work and more to do with how you interact with others, is continued in Social Intelligence. You have to be able to read others, read the situation, and act in a way that will bring the most positive outcome while still (even if not immediately) benefiting yourself. It all seems like common sense, but these are skills that require time to learn.

Social Intelligence continues on these themes, but with a neuroscience bent. Rather than relying on the theoretical aspects of psychology, Goleman here discusses the more scientific or biological side. When humans are social, things happen to our brains, receptors fire, different regions are activated during different kinds of interactions, to different facial expressions and body postures, and it all happens so fast, making our reactions instantaneous. This instant reaction is what he calls the low road, and the low road lives in those parts of the brain responsible for things like fear, anger, and altruism. Thinking about what to think takes more time, and this is the high road. The high road allows us to think about what the low road is telling us in order to discover what is happening.

Goleman disperses sage advice amongst illuminating stories and chronicles of numerous scientific experiments done in the social neuroscience and psychology fields. It is not only an enlightening book, but also easy to read. Using real-life examples, I found it easy to see how the inner workings of the brain are shaped by and shape social interactions.

For example, moods are contagious, be it an emotionally positive or negative experience. This low road contagion, however, can be overcome with a high road perception. Accurately identifying emotions and recognizing why they are happening allows us more control of social situations, thereby acting in an "emotionally intelligent" manner.

Also, when people are able to experience rapport, a very smooth interaction with a strong feeling of liking, comfort, and harmony, their brain activities are very similar. The same regions are activated, their bodies move in unison, they even breathe in unison. The brain chemistries seem to communicate with each other.

Goleman discusses the implications of social intelligence on interactions of all kinds, from personal and professional, to family and love. In addition, he points to the positive health consequences of being socially intelligent. He ends with the greater positive social consequences of using the I-You mentality rather than the I-It mentality.

We are all better off as individuals, groups, cultures, and a global society when we act in socially intelligent ways. The rub is that this is easier said than done. Each of us has acted in ways that were not beneficial to the situation, to others, or to ourselves at one time or another. The important thing is to learn from these low road impulses by activating our high road for the empathy and compassion needed for well-being.

Goleman used this quote and because of my affinity for all things Walt Whitman...
In "I Sing the Body Electric"

I have perceiv'd that to be with those I like is enough,
To stop in company with the rest at evening is enough,
To be surrounded by beautiful, curious, breathing, laughing flesh is enough...

I do not ask any more delight, I swim in it as in a sea.
There is something in staying close to men and women and looking on them,
and in the contact and odor of them, that pleases the soul well,

All things please the soul, but these please the soul well.

I personally found this book to cover a poignant topic due to my own struggles with the low road. I sometimes recognized myself in the not-too-pleasant stories and personalities. The knowledge in this book has helped me better understand myself and my reactions. The problem remains in changing those reactions, becoming a more intelligent high road user. It is not something you can do quickly or easily. You have to wait for a complex and/or emotional social interaction to arise and then practice the best techniques to handle it. But when it's happening to you, it can be difficult to recognize you are being tested. We all have different experiences that have allowed for a more finely tuned social intelligence in one aspect or another, but the goal is to be able to remain on the high road perpetually, to enhance the calm, and to truly care about others.

As I work my way through life, I try to find ways to make it an easier, happier existence for myself and for others around me. I fail miserably at times, but I succeed more often than not. It is sometimes difficult to forget my own emotions and realize the true situation. If I can stop for a minute and take a step back it helps, but in a high anxiety situation, it's hard to do. It's ironic how I like to know what's going on, yet find it difficult to be able to see it. In my quest to find ways to make life easier and society better, the message and knowledge in Social Intelligence will definitely help me. Now I practice.
2 vote Carlie | Feb 4, 2008 |
I usually don't finish non-fiction, but I read almost all of this book. I enjoyed the exploration of of neurological mechanisms behind social interactions, the science of why a certain interaction can just feel "off". I also liked Goleman's broader worldview- that violence and distrust are encouraged not innate. The last chunk of the book deals with how stress hormones, such as cortisol, affect the body's ability to fend off illness, showing a direct correlation between oppression and ill health. This information has been explored in a variety of other books, among them Bowling Alone and Why Zebras Don't Get Ulcers, but Goleman does a good job of tying it in to his other observations on social intelligence and how one's possession of it can have a positive effect on one's own health and the health of the community.
  austenheroin | Sep 12, 2007 |
Not as good as Emotional Intelligence, also by Goleman. I expected more concrete advice & information, less academic exposition. ( )
  montano | Jul 12, 2007 |
A very learned consideration of social intelligence that redefines Goleman's view of emotional intelligence. Full of interesting research but not as practical as karl Albrecht's book of the same name. ( )
  DannyMorris | Nov 13, 2006 |
We are reading this for our All Campus Learning Community for 2010-11. I will write my review in parts. The first will be done in November, during which time we will be reading and discussing the Introduction and Part 1, Wired to Connect. ( )
  taobrarian | Nov 3, 2010 |
Showing 14 of 14

Current Discussions

None

Popular covers

Quick Links

Rating

Average: (3.77)
0.5
1 3
1.5
2 7
2.5 6
3 44
3.5 12
4 60
4.5 6
5 38

Is this you?

Become a LibraryThing Author.

 

About | Contact | Privacy/Terms | Help/FAQs | Blog | Store | APIs | TinyCat | Legacy Libraries | Early Reviewers | Common Knowledge | 216,657,946 books! | Top bar: Always visible
  NODES
Community 2
Experiments 1
golem 18
HOME 2
Idea 1
idea 1
Interesting 7
languages 1
Note 1
os 26