Afi is a young seamstress whose tough life is suddenly upended by a marriage proposal brought for her by her mother's employer. This wealthy lady wants Afi to marry her son Elikem, who is in love with some Liberian woman, whom the family doesn't approve of, though he even has a child with her and wants to be with her.

While forced into marriage because of her circumstances, Afi soon finds herself drawn to the wealthy and convenient lifestyle. She uses her circumstances to advance in her studies and career but soon decides that she wants it all, that she can't share her husband with another woman.

It is so tough to rate a novel by virtue of its writing alone when you simply didn't like the main character. The first couple of chapters reveal Afi as a vulnerable, uncertain young woman whose life seems to be no longer in her control. But soon, she reveals herself to be quite shallow and self-centred. She seems to judge others for the very things that she is guilty of. I hated her for those double standards and simply couldn't connect with her. Rather than evoking empathy or understanding, she just leaves you frustrated.

His Only Wife is set in Accra, the capital of Ghana. Unlike what you would assume though, the book doesn't reveal the Africa we usually see but the Africa we don't hear about, the life of the wealthy in Africa. There's an abundance of snazzy lifestyles and flashy material possessions. All this cannot mask the familial compulsions or societal pressures. The extent to which relatives can interfere into personal lives seemed to me very reminiscent of Indian society.

There are reviewers who have called the book feminist. But feminism isn't about thinking about your own needs and wanting everyone to kowtow to your demands. Afi isn't a feminist, nor is she a good role model for a greater part of the novel.

Overall, the book starts off brilliantly but soon digresses into a repetitive romantic drama, and finally going into an atypical ending in the very last chapter. So I loved the start and end but hated everything in between.

I heard this as an audiobook and the narrator, Soneela Nankani, did a lot to salvage the book in my eyes. Her enunciation and expressions make it a wonderful audiobook to listen to. If only the story too held up to those standards!

I received an advance review copy of the audiobook for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.




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Afi lives in the small town of Ho in Ghana. When her mother's boss, "Aunty," proposes to Afi on her son Eli's behalf, Afi's family is elated that good fortune has come their way, but Eli doesn't even attend the wedding, and Afi doesn't see him for weeks, although she is installed in a luxurious flat in Accra. Afi longs for her husband to come so they can begin their life together, but in the meantime, she attends fashion school and dreams of setting up her own boutique. Over a couple of years, she realizes some truths about Eli's family and his other woman, and although she loves him, she insists on a divorce when she accepts that she will never be his only wife.

Quotes

It wasn't easy being the key to other people's happiness, their victory, and their vindication. (4)

"Not everyone who smiles with you wishes you well." (32)

How in the world was I going to turn things around when I wasn't even being given the chance? (94)

If there was one thing I agreed with my mother on, it was that one could never be sure about a person's intentions, no matter how kind that person seemed. (107)

Everyone knows that a person is nothing without family.... (121)

This tendency of his not to allow me to be a woman, to be a wife, was troubling. (132)

"Why should I listen to you? Do you ever listen to me?" (220)

"When you dismiss my pain and suffering as unreasonable. When you refuse even for a minute to empathize with me. How would you feel if I cheated on you?" (267)

"Why can't you just admit that your brother was with a woman that none of you liked and so you tried to use me to get him to leave her....There's nothing wrong with her! She's a woman who you don't like because she does as she pleases and doesn't dance to your tune." (271)

"Afi, you are not weak....It takes strength to walk away from someone you love. You were brave to say that you didn't want to be miserable..." (276) ( )

“They had put me in this tower and given me money like a schoolgirl. What was I supposed to do?“ asks Afi, a seamstress from a small town in Ghana who must confront which career goals and personal desires she is willing to sacrifice in order to build a successful new marriage with her wealthy husband. Under pressure from both of their families, she experiences the both the benefits of financial security from her new relationship, as well as the reality that it will test her career ambitions and her expectations for a romantic relationship.
Full of humor and detailed descriptions of rural and urban life in Ghana, I thoroughly enjoyed listening to this audiobook and did not want the story to end. I recommend for anyone interested in women’s stories set in Ghana and stories about choosing one’s own path, especially when facing pressure and expectations from family and society ( )

Afi, a pretty but poor young woman from small-town Ghana, enters into an arranged marriage with Eli, the son of a wealthy local family who already has a child and a long-term relationship with a woman of whom his mother disapproves. Peace Adzo Medie tries to grapple with some important issues in His Only Wife—particularly patriarchal structures and women's roles in upholding them—but sadly she isn't a strong enough writer to do them justice. Afi is the only character here who comes across as a real person, and even that is tenuous. The rest of the book reads like notes towards a soap opera script. ( )

My Only Wife by Peace Adzo Medie is a 2020 Algonquin Books publication.

The novel is set in Ghana and follows Afi, a young woman who aspires to be a fashion designer, but is coerced into an arranged marriage with Elikem, a wealthy businessman who already has a mistress and a child. Afi is confined to an apartment while the mistress occupies the main house, and she soon realizes that Elikem will never commit to her unless she challenges the expectations of her mother and her in-laws. Afi decides to stand up for herself, pursue her career goals, and demand respect from Elikem, even if it means breaking her own heart.

The book starts off slowly but gains momentum as Afi’s character develops and changes. I was drawn into Afi’s story and enjoyed witnessing her transformation from a passive and obedient wife to a confident and independent woman.

The only other issue I had was that many editorial review mentions humor in their 'blurbs', but more often than not, I found myself feeling righteous indignation for Afi and even sadness at the way she was being used. I didn't find anything here all that funny or light-hearted.

That said, I admired Afi's courage and determination to confront the people who manipulated and exploited her, and to refuse to settle for less than she deserved. Afi’s journey not only empowers herself, but may also free others in her life who are affected by her choices.

Overall, a bittersweet tale- but one of hope and resilience.

3.5 stars ( )